Tabanca part II
You know how there are some things that happen in your life that you just can’t tell the people around because its sooooo embarassing well this is one of those things at least i can put it on my blog anyway.
I think I got hit with tabanca…..trini term for a broken heart.......and it is punishment for making fun of my friend last year. I loosed a lot of weight in a very short time I think its like when you go to the gym and you feel fantastic right after but then a few days pass and you wake up in pain all over well that’s what happened to me I thought I was doing so great I was flying high then my son goes to spend a couple weeks with his dad and the house felt so empty I mean empty empty and instead of using the free time to walk around naked and watch dirty movies on cable and just make mischief ….. all I know is one day I wake up feeling low low low....down to the ground low........can’t eat or sleep I mean everything tasted like cardboard.
My twin sister thinks I am on some secret diet and wants me to tell her what is it I’m doing she promised me that she’ll find out ha! Its so obvious everyone is complimenting me on my weight loss and I have to just keep a straight face no one has figured out what is going on so its not so bad…. My son noticed the first time he hugged me on his return he tells me mommy you feeling smaller.
Most people assume its some new diet I am on because I am always trying something even in school all my mates keep going on about how small I am now….when ah tell yuh this tabanca thing is real there is this commercial on the radio where the guy says ......it hit meh like a ton ah bricks …..well that’s how it is ah get hit hard….ah promise never to make fun of anybody again in the future getting your heart broken eh easy…. I think its funny well I can laugh now because life is so funny when you think about it you never know when its your turn so be kind to people and don’t laugh at them remember the saying those who laugh last.....blah blah blah........ yes ah look for it as we trinis like to say…..never me again ah staying away from love it dangerous yes.
One week I’m declaring how strong I am and th next I go days without bathing I could write a book yes.
Anyway I am seeing a therapist I love her she’s like an aunt I don’t know why I was so against therapy I could never understand what is the point of talking to some stranger about your problems....all I can say is it works examining yourself figuring out what happened to you along the way and fixing what is broken going to my sessions has become the highlight of my week.
I am slowly getting my apetite back these days right now I am craving some double stuff oreos.