SmallIslandGirl

just a chick from Trinidad writing about her life on a small island but with big dreams all the same.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Blogging

I've thought about this blog and why do i find it so hard somedays to blog.

I started this blog i'm not sure why I think after reading Tony Pierce's and JAG's blog for some time i felt like it was a club that i wanted to join and when Tony was nice enough to explain that starting a blog was not as hard as i thought i said why not and i have no regrets about it sometimes i feel bad about being so anonimous because to tell the truth i really prefer blogs with pictures especially of the authors.

I am at a point in my life where i find that I am censoring myself you know afraid or don't want to blog about my marriage, don't want to blog about my job, don't want to blog about the times I am down and so i come on here logon and can't think of anything to write about and days pass and i mean i did not blog not once for the month of April and i keep wondering what happened back in April that made me stop blogging then i remember it was when i ended my friendship with my best friend and the thing is Bob Marley said... when one door closes another one opens and i truly believe that.

I've met someone this person found me thru my blog he sent me a simple email back in April and now my life is completely completely different i consider him a long lost friend i don't know if you can call someone you have never met face to face a friend we speak on the phone often and he has made such a difference in my life i don't know how to explain it without sounding ....i don't know.....sounding silly but one of our first conversations he told me that my happiness should not lie in another person that you must find it within yourself but i don't agree with him a person another human being CAN make you happy just because of who they are and from their kindness you know i think thats why blogging is so great i post something on here and i get really kind people leaving comments and telling me nice things and he has managed to make me a happy girl, its amazing how our differences does not matter he lives in another country we have little in common but still we are able to form a friendship i still can't get over that, he is such a great guy he has taught me a lot especially about myself makes me look at things differently, helped me thru some really really tough times and i am so grateful.
I don't know what compelled him to send me that email but i am so glad that he did.
I want to tell him thank you! thank you! for being my friend and no matter what you say Germany is going to kick Argentina's butt tomorrow!

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

The Breakup

Saw The Breakup movie over the weekend was suppose to see it with a girlfriend but she never showed up so i saw it alone and was glad too because i am a cryer in movies thank God the movie theater is dark but sometimes if you are sitting near a friend you can't hide the sniffling sounds your nosemakes from crying i had that experience seeing Notting Hill with some girlfriends talk about embarassing and to this day everytime i hear that Al Green song..... How can you mend a broken heart.... i remember that part of the movie and get goose bumps and feel to cry all over again.

Anyway i am going off point the thing is they describe the movie as a Romance-Comedy well to tell the truth i have to see the movie again because i did not laugh not even once during the movie i just did not think any part of it was funny i think it mirrors my life a little too much so i wasn't in the mood to laugh and how can you use romance to describe a movie and not have not one love scene in it NOT ONE really really misleading and i did not like Vince Vaughn in the movie at all i hope he is no way like his character in the movie in real life.

I don't want to spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet maybe the problem was just me........ i was in a blue mood and they showed the trailer for a new 9/11 movie starring Nicholas Cage and that kinda sent my mood down, anyway the one good thing though i think Jennifer Aniston looked great in the movie loved everything she wore I liked the chemistry she and Vince had I liked the Charater played by Judy Davies one thing i know in life is that every woman should have an older woman friend/mentor.

I guess i will have to see the movie again perhaps with a friend next time .

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Superstitious

So the Soca Warriors are back home and the Government made them all Millionaires by rewarding their efforts in the World cup and yes i did watch the match between Paraguay and feel bad because i still get that nigling feeling that maybe if i did NOT watch the match it may have had a different outcome but i am not the only superstitious one my girlfriend who was watching the match in a popular bar here said she started crying as the guys came out on the field because they were wearing white and she thought that was bad luck because the team always do better when they wear red and that in a war you wave a white flag to concede and by them wearing white they did not have a chance i just told her don't go around telling too many people that because they may think you are crazy.

I haven't been able to watch all the matches but am really looking forward to that match on Friday between Germany and Argentina i actually made a bet with someone that Germany will win and i know i have no business making bets especially since i know nothing about football i usually support teams based on silly things like how good looking the players are and the main reason why i am supporting Germany is for sentimental reasons i liked the way the German fans supported the Soca Warriors so i am supporting their team in return and my back up team is Brazil and of course the reason why i am supporting them is because i looooove Ronaldinho ohhh i think he's cute ( me fanning myself) not as cute as Russel Latapy though.... ohhhh weee....( me fanning myself some more ).

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Weary

Ok so my plan seem to be working didn't watch the match today either and from what i understand the Soca Warriors are still doing good.... Go Soca Warriors......

I heard this song on the radio today and its my new favorite song I HAVE to get the cd the words hit me and i love the singers voice its so beautiful. The lines in red are my favorite parts you can hear the song by clicking here .


Weary by Amel Larrieux

This woman is growing weary
Of having to be so strong
Of having to pretend I'm made of stone
So I won't end up with no broken bones
I can't fight every battle alone

I want someone to lift me
Heal my wounds and give me kisses on my head
Say words that should be said
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And lay down my guard

Chorus:
If I could trust someone
To have my back and never do me wrong
Then I would give my love up
Just like that stop singing this soldier song
(repeat)

whomever said love was overrated
must not be getting' none ................I love this line in the song......
my independent days have had their fun
but when the parties over
and the workin' day is done
I just want to come home to someone

I want a love to take me
As I am not make me compromise myself
Or be like no one else
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And just lay down my guard

Chorus

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Cause i'm a soca warrior....

So did anyone see the game between Trinidad and Tobago and Sweden i heard it was good and the score was nil nil.

I did not see the game because i am superstitious and think if i watch any of the games i would bring bad luck to the team so my contribution to the team is to not watch any of the games live.

Oh God who am i fooling? the reason why i can't watch any of the games is because i can't stomach it I really had plans to watch the game stood up in my living room and got teary when they played our national Anthem but todays game was just too much stress so i hid upstairs and listened to my husband and sister and neighbours chant and shout at the tv and carryon and give themselves headaches over the game me i just checked in now and then to get updates i really couldn't watch the thing live too much stress ah tell yuh.

But i must say that i feel so proud of those guys makes me proud to be a Trinidadian and especially when the commentators kept repeating that our country is the smallest nation to ever qualify for the World Cup.
Can't wait to see Thursdays game against England i know i won't be able to watch that live either but i am praying for the boys to do us proud.

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Family..........

Its the third today and i only cried once for the month so far it wasn't a long cry i stopped myself it was because something didn't go the way i wanted it to go and i just had to shed a few tears so far so good.
Oh Gosh there is this one tiny mosquito bothering me right now i've hit my right arm so many times now i am leaving marks ................
I miss my scale though i had a ritual where i stand on it naked after a shower and now i miss it but i'll survive though its just one month i can do this.
My twin sister and i are still talking we spent friday evening together i have to say my moms is the best she has been trying to get us to talk for some time now she will just mention little things about my sis every time we talk and i just do my best to just ignore her because it always goes like this my sister will do something to get me angry we would stop talking and i will ALWAYS ALWAYS be the one to make the first move and make up if i don't things stay as they are and i had made up my mind this time i was done but my mom called and told me my sis was having a crisis at work and she wasn't doing good at all and she begged me to call her and i did because i had the same experience once i called offered to take care of her son for a few nights so she can focus on what she needed to do and we all prayed a lot and gave her all the support she needed thankfully things are better for her now and thats it thats how come we are talking now my dad says we used to always be like that as kids we could be warring amongst ourselves but if something should happen to one of us we always could just forgive and forget easy i guess thats what family is about.
I have to end this now and go find a way to kill this dam mosquito the rainy season is really on us now............