just a chick from Trinidad writing about her life on a small island but with big dreams all the same.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005


Does this happen to anyone else? The diamonds in my wedding ring shines real bright on those days when I am thinking naughty thoughts I just noticed that when I told huzy this he said he put a magic spell on my ring the thing is he has a plain band so does that mean I have to be worried because what stops him from doing naughty things hopefully his conscious.

I've been thinking about marriage a lot lately because its in the news a lot these days from Babyface to Gabrielle Union she was in Trinidad last year playing mas even Haille Berry came to Trinidad one carnival its an epidemic the divorce thing I bloged about some friends we met for carnival a long time ago who invited us to their wedding about 2 years ago and now they are getting a divorce we haven't even developed the film from their wedding yet (long story).

What makes a marriage work for some I look around for an example you know of a marriage that I can use as an example of what you should do and there is non not my parents my dad made a mess of things ask him he'll tell you what not to do.

I guess my in-laws my husband's father and stepmother I mean from the outside looking in what have I observed
She makes basically the same meal often for dinner meatballs and spaghetti guaranteed if you visit for diner anytime in the week you will be served this at first I thought maybe that's all she knows how to cook but no its her husbands favorite meal so that's what she makes me I don't think I really know what my husbands favorite thing to eat I should wake him right now and ask him and cook that all the time this is so embarrassing I am bursting my brain trying to think what his favorite meal is.... Terrible wife that I am.

He has his life separate from the hers he plays a lot of golf he goes on tournaments with his pals sometimes in other states I guess they don't need to be up under each other all the time that's it husband needs to pickup some kind of sport will suggest this to him one more reason to wake him.

They take trips together this year they took a cruise to Europe just the two of them so romantic imagine at 60 and still getting it on with the husband.(Have to play the lotto for that one but its been ages since we took a trip together alone shameful our son is 5 and we have not taken a trip anywhere without him must fix that.

I have seen them disagree but never mean with each other and I like that he complains about her shopping and how tiredsome it is but last time we were there for thanksgiving we woke up to them returning from an early morning shopping trip to Macy's even though he complains he still takes her because like me she doesn't drive so adorable when you think about it.

So its not all bad there are good marriages out there I guess they don't make the news as often as the Brad and Jennifer breakup stories these days its easier to throw in the towel as opposed to fight for your marriage note to self.


Blogger Mad Bull said...

My mother and father were married for 51 years (I think) by the time he died. Were they happy all the time? No, but they stuck to it. They worked through the rocky times when money was short (lots of the time, really, they had plenty hungry belly children (7)) and through many other issues that I am not privy to, I guess. At the end of it all, they stuck together and both of them told me that they were happy with the marriage and that they thought the time they had shared to have been worthwhile.
Stick-to-it-iveness is whats required, as well as both participants loving each other enough to try to be unselfish (for the times when compromise is necessary).
Nowadays, people don't value the institution of marriage anywhere near as highly and so, when it seems like it isn't suiting either party, they just flash.

12:37 PM  
Blogger smallislandgirl said...

mb its great that you have your parents as an example it really is great even though it seems to be an oldfashion thing i truly hope to be one of those long time married people you'r right stick-to-it-iveness is what is required...

12:50 PM  
Blogger Abeni said...

yup..gotta stick it through.As I keep hearing no marriage is perfect but you ride out the tough times

9:31 PM  
Blogger -jkg said...

yeah its weird im at this age where 3 years ago all my friends were getting married and now they are having babies or getting divorced. its like aging vicariously through someone else

1:45 AM  
Blogger Scratchie said...

The commitment to it is what is so lacking today. My parents have gone 41 years and I did my 18th this year. It hasn't been easy and yeah there are the quarrels but then there are the good times and the communication which I think is a key factor. I tell her all the decisions I am making and she does the same....we run things by each other.

8:24 AM  
Blogger JaG said...

I typed a really really long comment and then Haloscan ate it!!! AAAAARG!!!

So here's the short version; my parents have the best marriage and JaB has never really seen his parents together because they got divorced when he was a baby. I think my parents gave him back some belief in marriage.

12:42 PM  
Blogger Ri said...

I am getting close to 8 years now so not too bad. My parents are on their 43rd, so pretty good. My brother who is younger, is on his 10th year, so there is hope, I hope. Hey I lost my wedding ring some months ago. No one believes it, they are like, oh, sure you lost it. But no I did lose it this time. Wifey not too concerned though, and no need.

10:15 PM  
Blogger Jdid said...

mine is only 5 but its hard work. ignore the celebrity marriages, waste a time dealing with that.

11:03 PM  
Blogger Stunner said...

Quick marriages and quick devorces is just a hollywood lifestyle. So that's nothing to look at.

Real marriages take commitment, respect, forgiveness, and a listening ear. You have to ass pice to the marriage and keep the fire burnig with inovative ideas. You have to spend time together and you have to have fun with each other when you do get to spend time together. Everyone needs their own space at times. "the family that prays together, stays together"-hence God haffi inna di plan. But hey, I'm no expert...I'm still not married yet!

9:48 AM  
Blogger CoolDestiny said...

Most people think I'm stupid when I say that I can't wait to get married and when I do, I intend to be married till I die. It is an ambitious statement, I know, but with God's help I'll have a happy, fulfilling marriage - with all the romance, all the fights, all the disagreements, the children, the proud moments, etc, etc, etc. Marriage is a lot of work and both must want it to work for it to last.

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